Recovering from your failures.

It's happened to all of us. Those of us who are older will be more familiar with this than the younger people on the site.

Sometimes, for the lucky few, these failures go unnoticed. Be they a silly game here in RM, to something much grander.

Sometimes, though, our failures mar us. They scar us. They mark us and it can be pretty hard to overcome that and to essentially tell the world "No, I'm/we're not doomed to fail again. Give me/us a chance!"

How DO you overcome your failures?  For those who have overcome previous failures and--even better--made them into successes, share!

No judgement, folks. I (As well as inquiring minds) really want to know.

I guess for me it would be, just attempt it another day. It happened when I was learning to drive. Now, I drive more then I can remember, and honestly, driving is as boring as it gets.

Woops.

Time to try again without messing up this time.

Failures can also be driven into you by really crappy people. In my instance, my dad essentially said I was garbage (we never ever got along) and kicked me out which led to dropping out of my college education. And I won't lie, I really did feel like crap after working however many foodservice jobs I've had over the past few years, and it felt like a dead end to me. I honestly felt like working minimum wage jobs was all I could do in life.

But eventually, I realized that I don't need others to dictate what I am. After working hard in my dead-end jobs and being promoted into management positions a couple of times, I had enough money to sustain myself. I had my own place and I had a decent amount of savings. Soon followed my return to college. And I'm really proud I did all of that myself. Failure is normal in life, but it does not have to be something that overtakes your life. Cheesy as it is, believe in yourself, work hard, and you're bound to succeed.

There is a reason for the phrase "You're your own worst enemy."  The very word "failure" is a harsh self-judgment.  Did I make mistakes?  Absolutely.    Will I make many more?  Absolutely.    But there is a gigantic difference between a mistake and failure.  A "failure" is a harsh voice in your head which beats you down long after the mistake has been made.  Only you can change that critical voice, nobody else can ever do it for you.

So, as long as we learn from our mistakes and avoid judging ourselves for making them, we are never failures.  But it's taken a long time for me to stop judging and turning on myself for making mistakes, so it's easy to say and harder to do.

Once, Thomas Edison was asked "How do you feel about your 2000 failures in making a working light bulb?"

He replied "I did not have 2000 failures.  I have learned 2000 things which will not make a working light bulb."

If you look at civilization in the large, it can only exist because of many mistakes our ancestors have made --- and then learned from.  Evolution does this on a global level with all life.  Every change might be a mistake, or might serve a purpose, so in effect life learns from its mistakes, even if as individual beings, particular creatures do not.

So, I guess I'm saying I do my best never to "recover from failures" as much as I learn from the many mistakes I make.  Even if what I learn is "XYZ just isn't a core strength of mine and I'm not willing to put in the effort to try to improve it."

Times heals all wounds. A scar itself is the result of healing and it only serves as a reminder. You'll sometimes look at a scar and remember how it happened, even how badly it hurt at the time, but it never feels the same as when it did when it was freshly open. Even when our past used to be the present, it is never as important as the current present or the future. And our failures, that word has terrible connotation, are teachings for us on how to live the present. No one can know before they are taught. I say something to this effect all the time, "You have to not know, before you know. And do, before you can do well." 

Bravo, you guys. Excellent, excellent answers! :)

Just for me, failure is essential for a learning block actually. Kind of looking at it in a positive way. 

In my own personal experience, it's only a "failure" if you stop trying... you only "fail" when you don't want to keep going. If you learn from your mistakes then all it is is just a mistake. It might've been a bad one, but a mistake nonetheless.

Learning from our mistakes will help us grow. :D