This one made me chuckle for quite awhile:
An old man and old woman (his wife) go to see a doctor. He starts with the old man and surprisingly finds the old man is in excellent health. He asks the old man why.
The old man says it's because of his good and clean life.
"Your good and clean life" the doctor says?
"Yes. I live such a good and clean life the Lord Himself turns the light on for me when I use the bathroom, and the Lord Himself turns it off when I'm done."
"Ummm...the Lord does this?"
"Definitely."
The doctor shakes his head and finishes the exam. Then, the old woman comes in and asks "How is my husband?"
"Physically he's fine, but I'm worried about his mental state."
"What do you mean?"
"He says he lives such a good clean life that the Lord Himself turns the light on when he uses the bathroom and turns it off when he's done."
The old woman says "Oh my god! I don't believe it!"
"I know and I'm sorry."
The old woman sighs and replies:
Spoiler
"That darned fool is peeing in the fridge again!"